Monday, Aug. 10, 2009 - 9:58 p.m.

i spent the last 15mins reading what i blogged about last yr around this time.

i realised i was trapped in that insecurities, my emotions went up and down along with every single sentence he said. amazed at what his replies could do to me that time.

this yr on a public holiday, i was doing nth. i just had this thought. why do i feel like, on a free day like this, if it was one yr ago when things werent that tense, i would have been chatting with him via sms?

but well too bad, that was just a thought.

this yr, i woke up early and had my mac breakfast with my dad and bro (: lovely rainy cool morning i know. then i spent the rest of the time, watching movies..basically idling my life away. just pampering myself before the worst begins.

u know sometimes, i have this feeling that i can live well without anyone around..i cant imagine myself being attached with a boyfren. i was just discussing this with mian on the bus yest night. as much as i wish i will have a boyfren soon, i dont know if i could face the same person for majority of the time.. weird thinking i have. and i bet more than one person will think that im weird.

so what exactly do i need? what exactly do i want? need vs want..

this time,i activated it again. and this time around,im not going to do anything about it. why should i make myself upset when i obviously know i will get upset?

xq puts it, 'win yourself..'

yes, im going to win my emotions. (:

school is starting and we will all be the oldest students in school. can you imagine me having bubble thought that says "omg he is cute! oh wait he is younger than me.."

hilarious. thats the reason why eye candy exists.

oh well..sings to the songs playing..

^s0rr|

sunset - sunrise